Wednesday, July 9, 2003

When something is disturbing me — be it an issue at school, work, or at home — I tend to lose sleep over it. While everyone snores, I’m up at 3 in the morning, thinking about whatever it is that is keeping me from a sound sleep.

It’s 3:27am, and I’ve been up for about 15 minutes. Why am I up? Nothing is really in my mind. Then again, it’s a bit hard to sleep hearing sounds that would normally result from foot-steps, but like I said, everyone is asleep, except me.

I’ve had different explanations for those unidentified sounds. I used to think it was the sound that the frame of a bed would make when coming into repeated contact with a wall. So then, when I first heard the sound, I thought, “Great, my parents are doing it.” When I heard the sounds on a second night, I didn’t think it was my parents — their stamina can’t be that good! This time I placed the blame on Jaime and Guera. The third time I heard the sounds I had nobody else to suspect of, but Nayeli. Who would she do it with? I don’t know, but she must have been doing something this late at night!

Prior to then, my explanation for the sounds wasn’t as dirty-minded. I used to think that Guera’s former boyfriend was walking up and down the house, and that’s where the sounds came from. He did have big shoes. He did walk slowly. It never occurred to me, however, that this guy had no reason to be up early in the morning, and so maybe it wasn’t him who was pacing around the house.

With him gone, the question re-emerged: who or what is responsible for the sounds? The last time I had heard the noise, I got out of bed, walked through the living room, into the dining room, and then into the kitchen. Nobody was there. I walked back into the dining room, stood there, and stared out the windows, hoping that Nayeli, who was sleeping in the living room, would say to me, “What is going on?” Then I’d have been able to say that I’m wondering what it is I was hearing. Again, everyone rested, everyone snored, everyone but me. No one for me to ask, “Can you hear that?”

What causes me to often wake up at 3am in the morning, and not before or after? What’s so special about 3am? More importantly, what’s the sound I hear? Is someone pacing around the house? Is there an animal on the attic? Or one under the base of the house?

One day I’ll have the guts to go outside with the determination not to come back into bed until I’ve found a good explanation for the sounds. In the meantime, when awaken during the night, I’ll practice the most persuasive way to say… “Go easy on me, please!”

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