Wednesday, November 19, 2003

One thing I’d love to see happening soon is… fall in love with the woman who I’m to spend the rest of my life with. Let this love be many times stronger than that I experienced the first time I fell in love. I want to be ridden of the insecurity that became part of me when I became a heartbroken man. I do not want to be haunted by the question, “Will our love last?”

A more important thing I desire is… to have both of my parents alive long enough to see me turn into an old man. I want my mother to be able to play “Las Mañanitas” very early in the morning on each of my upcoming birthdays. I want her around to ask me the days before my birthday, “What will you like to eat for your birthday?” Even if a few days before my birthday we agree on what she’ll be cooking, and when my birthday is all said and done, she fails to cook my dinner! Heh, she still owes me some “mole” (Mexican dish) from last year. 🙂

And my father? At the very least, let him live long enough to see me graduate from college. He really doubts he’ll be alive to see that day. Not because he feels himself to be an old man, but because he knows that my day of graduation is so many years away. Heh. I also would like for him to be around to be part of my wedding and in later years, take joy in being my kids’ “aguelito” — their grandfather. I want him to be there when they start calling him “abuelo” — when they are grown up — so that he can share with them his stories about how he has so often defied death.

Why has the word “birthday” made it to this blog entry? Well, ten years ago today, I was celebrating my 15th birthday. There was to be a dinner, and people were to come. There was a dinner, and people came. People I had not met before. People I would not befriend, as they were 20 years older than I was. They were my dad’s coworkers. Pitiful sight! Me in a living room with my father and two other men, all holding beer, all talking of things I knew nothing about. What a party! 🙂 That was the last time I ever “celebrated” a birthday. Since then, I have treated every birthday as if it were just any other day.

But well, today I’m 25. Yup, twenty-five. After all I’ve been through, I think it’s time to say with a smile, “Happy birthday, self.” 🙂

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